


"It Didn't Feel Pain"

by Catminty



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Coping, M/M, Miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-03
Updated: 2013-06-03
Packaged: 2017-12-13 20:03:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/828294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catminty/pseuds/Catminty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jazz miscarries. Emotional exploration.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"It Didn't Feel Pain"

"Ratchet did say we are unable to know for sure," Prowl said as he worked studiously at his desk. His digits click-clacked across the keyboard. "Aside from the short-lived strain on your frame, you have not been harmed by the hypothetical situation." 

Hypothetical situation. Jazz stared blankly at the wall across from the one he leaned himself against. He was out of the game for several days a few weeks back. "Medical reasons" was plastered on his personal record. They didn't know what had happened exactly or why the saboteur went from "peachy" to "bedridden" in a day. The pain was sharp; more than a punch to the gut, by less than the slice of a blade.

"Mm," Jazz confirmed halfheartedly, visor dim to a softly glowing baby blue. The hand resting above his armored spark chamber gripped sharply, leaving light score lines in his paint. "Yep, Doc says I'm all better." Jazz kicked off the wall and walked to the door. "I'm gonna go out drivin'. See ya, Prowler." His bondmate nodded in silent affirmation, focused on his work.

It was already late; the Earth's star was setting on the horizon. Jazz rolled out of the base and casually glided over the worn back roads scattered around the base.

Ratchet commed him that morning with an update that required a private meeting. That kind of message normally didn't bode well for the patient. Luckily, Jazz was alright. Having a miscarriage was quite normal, and the carrier rarely suffered permanent harm. Bad coding was usually the cause. It was something out of the progenitors' control. The newspark simply broke down and faded before it gained a consciousness of its own. It's frame was nothing more than an itty bitty spark casing nestled in the carrier's gestation chamber. What with all the energon he lost when he got bedridden, it was probably expelled before Jazz's back hit the medical berth. 

A soft sway shifted Jazz's alternate frame back and forth on the abandoned road. His focus lost its usual sharpness. Just for a little while, he let himself feel the wind rush over his hood and the dirt flatten beneath his tires.  

It wasn't even really alive yet, so it didn't feel pain. That's what Ratchet said. Jazz, himself, was already fully repair and completely functional now. Plus, well, he and Prowl really weren't planning on having sparklings anyway. So this purge was a blessing, not a loss.

He lost acceleration. A dull numbness overtook his frame as his engine sputtered off. Silent, in the middle of the cool, barren desert, Jazz rested and absorbed the overwhelming nothingness.

It was for the best. 

Right?

**Author's Note:**

> I don't like basing things off my own life, but I had to get this out. I'm sorry if it offends anyone.


End file.
